Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize