Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
