living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
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