Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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