How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
