I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize