Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
