I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
