I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
