In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
