We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
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