i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
