Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
