Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Sorry about my life...
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
