I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
