I have demons in me.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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