Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
