i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize