it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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