No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
So squirting runs in the family.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
