Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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