I wanna bring you to show and tell
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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