yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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