One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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