Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Randomize
