you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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