the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
