Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
