Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Randomize
