The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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