He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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