In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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