Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
