hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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