yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
