using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
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