it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize