I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Randomize
