You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
