The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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