The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
