it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
