one might say we're banned from that church
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
