She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
