who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize