I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize