before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
wow bdsm is so cute
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
