the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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