Jerry, you need to find god
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Randomize
