thus making me awesome and them whores
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I have already put on my inside pants.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
