$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Randomize
