lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
birth control should be required to get into college
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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